OFF TO COLLEGE?

Now that you are graduating, you will be soon going off to college. I‘m sure you know how proud your mother and father, relatives and family friends (especially me) are of you. Growing up in East Cleveland, my summer before going off to Ohio State, didn't do much to prepare me for college life. No one I knew had ever gone to college and couldn't give me any advice. So I eventually learned what I now know, but it took a long, long time. Fourteen years ago, when my son was heading off to the University of Miami,I gave him this advice so he didn't have to figure it all out for himself. Time changes many things, but most (if not all) of this advice is still relevant.

The purpose of a formal education is to learn how to learn. Teachers can only teach you so much; the rest depends on how well you learn how to learn.  Over the next four years (and beyond) you will take many different subjects, packaged in a certain way called “courses”. Buried in the information taught in these courses (and your other experiences) are the nuggets of knowledge that you will have to dig out for yourself and repackage into wisdom. Here are some of the really important things to learn:

• How to excel at oral and written communication. Good writing requires good thinking. Understand the meaning of every word you speak, write, and hear.
• How to solve problems. Evaluate the options.
• How to get what you need from yourself.
• How to get resources ---information, money, and people.
• How to make good decisions.
• How to deal with “no” ---accept or reject.
• The second “3 R’s”---- your responsibilities, rights, and remedies.
• How systems (social, political, educational, legal, financial and business institutions) work and how to work within them.
• Understand our financial institutions ----where to get money, how to get money and how to manage it (banks, stocks, property, and other investment markets).
• Understand our legal system---courts, laws, and lawyers.
• Understand who has the power, how they got it and what they are willing to do to keep it.
• How to successfully complete a difficult project.
• How to manage others in successfully completing a difficult project.
• Understand why people behave the way they do and why you behave the way you do. All people are imperfect; learn how to identify their flaws and get to know yours.
• What really matters. Find the truth for yourself—don’t rely on others. Everyone sees the world thru their own filter of beliefs, values, and experiences. These change over time as you get more knowledge, experiences, etc.
• There are no absolutes, except this one.
• Success in life is living your life in your own way. Do what you love and it will never feel like work, it will be fun.
• All things in this world succeed or fail based on expectations, not the actual outcome.
• What you have to offer will be a thoroughly unique combination of skill, knowledge, aptitude, ability, and experience.
• If you could excel at only one thing, it should be the ability to learn. If you’re really good, the second most important thing to excel at is negotiating.

Some people are content (although I can’t imagine why) to bury themselves in reruns of Rocky and Bullwinkle and drink the Kool-Aid. What a waste of life. Your mother likes to remind us all that life is not a dress rehearsal--- and that may be the wisest observation of all.